The ocean is special to me because I find it alluring, curious and also incredibly terrifying. I gratefully got to look at it a lot growing up and into my adulthood. The ocean was my background. Always. It was the first thing I looked for and the last thing I said goodbye to before heading home.
The allure of the ocean never really went away. Inside that allure is a kind of terror. That’s the thing that has stuck with me the most. It feels like fire to a child. You know it has the potential to hurt you but you long to play with it anyway. I have connected with the ocean both physically and spiritually since my childhood. I remember clearly been in Acapulco, Mexico getting pulled out to the middle of the ocean on a banana boat. I’d heard of them but I’d never ridden one. This was the first time. As our speedboat pulled us further out, it began to accelerate and then without any warning made a sharp turn throwing us all overboard. I remember being overcome by SHEER TERROR. The ocean, holding us in its mouth, a mouth so deep that it had no base. Just a blue that got dark. Very quickly. So much so that you couldn’t see your legs. I still remember thinking “I hope nothing is below me right now!” Back on the boat with a bloody nose, I was relieved and couldn't wait to be back on dry land.
I still feel like the ocean is beckoning me to play with it, but not in any physical sense. More reflective. Almost calling me to go and look at it to see if I can finally figure out the puzzle of life. When I look out onto the ocean, I feel like I’m looking into a giant mirror of my life. When I see the waves crash against the rocks repeatedly, I see the stages of my life in them.
To me, the ocean is life and you are on it, in your boat like everyone else, whether you like it or not. We all have to take the storms but we have the chance to take a brief respite in the calm that comes after. We never really know when these moments might be, but that’s okay. That’s what we have in common, you and I.
We are on this journey in the never-ending ocean of life and sometimes things happen that you don’t see coming. You get hit by a swell. I like to think I have it figured out. That when a storm comes, I just batten down the hatches but that’s not true. I’m still figuring this “life” thing out, yet, I’m still out on the ocean, like you. As terrifying as it can be, there is no place I’d rather be. I find it alluring and simply beautiful. Maybe I’ll see you out there and if your boat is taking a beating, come and rest on mine a while. You’ll soon be out there again.
What represents the complexities of life for you?
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