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  • Tanya Gordon

Playtime is not just for children; women require it more than ever

As we have emerged from the Covid-19 pandemic, we should all take a page out of a 5-year-old's playbook.

When you think of playing, you may recall childhood activities such as digging in the sandbox or playing tag with your peers. However, when was the last time you genuinely played?


If you cannot recall, you may be missing out on some significant benefits, particularly as we begin to emerge from the Covid-19 pandemic, which disproportionately affected women. It is essential for problem-solving, creativity, sleep quality, cognitive function, confidence, and relationships that adults schedule time for play. As a real estate coach, I have observed my clients experiencing bouts of depression or simply feeling exhausted and worn out as a result of the past year's challenges.


I recommend making time for recreation and genuine enjoyment. And while your idea of play today undoubtedly does not involve sand, a bucket, and a shovel or a swing, the following are three ways you can incorporate play into your daily lives:


Understanding the power of play.


Play has a lot of power.


It can be harder than it sounds to learn to play again. Some people just know how to play, but others don't. During this epidemic, I've noticed that many of my clients have tried to escape their personal lives (or lack thereof) by burying themselves in work.


It makes sense. Work is always a good reason to keep doing things. Society accepts it, and it makes people feel like they are doing something useful and important. But too much work causes worry, anxiety, and exhaustion, and in the end, it makes a person dull. Someone who only talks and thinks about work is very one-dimensional, doesn't have any new ideas, and can seem boring and rigid. Brian Sutton-Smith, a psychologist who studies how people grow and change, says, "The opposite of play is not work; it is depression."


People often don't know what they're missing when they don't play often. Or, they have no idea where to begin. It's not easy to say, "I don't know how to have fun." Most people would rather keep working than say they are having trouble.


A great place to start is to figure out what kind of player you are. Stuart Brown, an expert on play, has found that there are eight different ways to play. These include being a joker, a rival, a storyteller, an artist, a collector, an explorer, a director, or a kinesthete, who plays through movement.


Think back to when you were young. What kinds of games did you like? Sports? Writing? Just going to a field and swinging? Embracing what's inside you will lead you to things you can do now that make you feel the same way. This can also help you stay away from things you don't really like.


Make it possible to play.


It's also not easy to make space for play. I had to work hard to get people to turn off their phones and leave work. Not because they love work so much, but because they don't know what to do with their time off. I don't mean things like going to the gym or cleaning out your clothes. Even though you might learn something from these things, they are not play. Play is something you do to make yourself happy without expecting anything in return.


Take some time and do a review of your play by asking:


What do you do that makes you lose track of time?


How long has it been since this happened?


What's stopping you from playing?


What do you need to change about the story in your head?


This last piece of the puzzle might be the hardest to find. We all have reasons why we don't do certain things, and we make up stories to explain it. For example, if you're a busy mom who works and feels bad about being away from your kids, you might skip your weekly tennis game because you think it's a waste of time. In this case, you need to understand that the benefits (less stress, better sleep, etc.) will also spread to those around you.


Get in and have fun.


Try the following to bring play back into your life:


Think about what real play means to you. You can play in many different ways. Explore your unique mix of play characters and link it to your present-day life.


Create time. Plan a real trip or one or more vacation days and don't work.


Collaborate. Find people to play with who will motivate you to put in the time to play.


Don't get sidetracked. Turn off your phone and enjoy the moment of play to get the most out of it.


Give yourself a break. At first, you might not be very good at it. It may be hard to stop thinking about work or stop feeling guilty. This is normal, and you'll get better as you play.


Practice. You can get better at play, but you have to do it often.


Play is an important part of our lives. With play, your stress will go away, and you'll have more energy for work and your personal life. Play to be a better person in the coming months and years.


Become the best version of yourself by RE-engaging in play

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